Gramps tried to teach me how to be white, and I was learning. But when I told him how people were responding to me and that I was being pushed aside, he tried to find out what the problem was. At first they told him all the white girls have some specific things but when he payed for me to have them the money was stolen or if I got the things they said it didnt count for me to have them.
He realized I was provisional white, but when gramps had been white he had been white so he went to the provisional white families asking them for help and all they wanted to do was marry me to the worst of their sons, or not even marry just let them abuse me for a while for fun.
Becky and grandma were sub provisional white, they were allowed to work in all white places to keep the asthetic but had to remember that they were subordinante to the point that they had to keep themselves sexually available for their boss or for his benifit. That is why I couldnt learn from them. Because I have this ticklish spot that makes me kill people who try to have sex with me but arent my husband.
